Your choice of a life partner will influence the rest of your life and also generations to come. In Amos Chapter 3 verse 3, the Bible says:

Can two walk together, unless they are agreed?

Amos 3:3

It is important for you to get married to someone who share your Christian faith. In 2 Corinthians Chapter 6 verses 14 and 15, the Bible says:

Do not be unequally bound together with unbelievers [do not make mismatched alliances with them, inconsistent with your faith]. For what partnership can righteousness have with lawlessness? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony can there be between Christ and Belial (Satan)? Or what does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?

According to Collins English Dictionary, “A yoke is a long piece of wood which is tied across the necks of two animals such as oxen, in order to make them walk close together when they are pulling a plough”. What this means is that the yoke keeps the animals united and fit for purpose, therefore the burden becomes lighter.  So, you have to select two animals with equal strength so they can work well together as a team.

If an ox is yoked with a donkey, it will become difficult for them to combine their abilities to plough together effectively; and they will end up working against each other. The two animals do not have the same nature and strength. Therefore, they will be pulled in different directions and eventually get exhausted.

There is no relationship that is more binding than marriage. God commanded believers not to get married to unbelievers and this commandment is for our good and protection. So, to knowingly walk into a relationship with an unbeliever is disobedience. Don’t get married with the intention of changing your spouse. The Holy Spirit is the only one who can do the work of redemption in a person’s life. So, you must be careful not to be of the world. Obey the word of God in Romans Chapter 12 verse 2:

Don’t copy the behaviour and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

On a spiritual level, your values, beliefs, principles, goals, priorities, purposes and passions are different to that of a non-Christian. I will give you a few reasons why a child of God must not get married to an unbeliever:

• It may hinder your relationship with Christ. Your spouse may resent the amount of time you are spending with God and at Church; you may have to sacrifice your devotion to Christ to maintain peace in your home.

• Your spouse may influence you negatively and cause you to act against your faith because they don’t love the Lord. A believer submits to Christ’s yoke; and his yoke is easy and his burden is light; so, you must not submit to another yoke that will pull you away from Christ. Don’t lose your salvation just to be in a relationship. Just as Second John Chapter 1 verses 8 and 9 puts it:

Be on your guard so that you do not lose all that we have diligently worked for but receive a full reward. Anyone who wanders away and does not remain faithful to the teaching of Christ has no relationship with God. But those who remain in the teaching of Christ have a wonderful relationship with both the Father and the Son. 

• Marriage is partnership. If you get married to an unbeliever, it will hinder the unity and oneness of your marriage because your hearts will not beat as one spiritually. Your spouse will not understand why you must pray, read your Bible or fellowship with other believers and they may decide not to participate. If both of you are not united spiritually, your growth as a couple will be hindered. This can make you feel alone because you will not be able to share what matters most to you with your spouse. God’s expectations is that you plough together in the same direction with the same purpose.

When a believer and an unbeliever are pulled in opposite directions, the harmony of their matrimony is weakened.

• Your children may not be taught of the Lord. A Christian home is formed when two people who are Christ-centred are joined together in marriage such that the union reflects the relationship between Christ and the Church. If you don’t have a Christian home, your spouse may prevent you from taking the children to Church or praying with them; and this will make it challenging for them to have a relationship with the Lord.

So, don’t compromise your love for God by marrying an unbeliever. Spare yourself the issues and complexities of a troubled marriage by choosing your life partner within the household of faith.